Beginning a New Chapter

I ended my last blog by sharing how God allowed me to see light at the end of the tunnel. This week, I will weave the events of April 16 through October 4, 2017, into Linda’s story, my story and God’s provision. For me, it is not melodramatic to believe the words of Charles Dickens summarize the tenor of what took place:

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.”

Excerpts from my journal notes, fill in the details:

Linda’s Story

• “Her behaviors run the gamut: Recently, I found her hiding in a closet. This was followed by quietly sitting with a faraway look in her eyes. Later, she mourned her failures and expressed a desire to go to heaven. Then, in the midst of all the confusion, she came over and tenderly hugged me from behind.”

• “She is again leading all of us down a path we have never traveled. Our task is to follow in a way that will allow our lives to be enriched, without causing her unnecessary anxiety.”

• “She cannot come back to us. We can go to her, on her terms, and receive her blessings in whatever way she is capable of giving them to us!”

My Story

• “I have bolt locks on the doors, clips to keep the windows from opening, and knives and sharp objects have been put away.”

• “During the sixteen hours each day, when no caregivers are available; if I were to become disabled or die, Linda would be in a state of terror. She could not open a door, get out a window or call for help. If she did manage to get outside, she would be at the mercy of the world.”

• “Today, I parked in the back of Legacy Village, viewed the construction taking place and shared my struggle with God. Sensing his presence, as I fervently prayed in the Spirit; I reminded him that opening day was near – as if he did not know – and that I had committed to Linda becoming a resident. I then drove down the street in front of the building and presented my final petition: ‘If there is any other way, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not my will, but your will be done.’ Heading home, I felt peace.”

God’s Provision 

Knowing that Linda would soon move to her new home, I scheduled prostate surgery for early August; so that I would have time to recover before the transition. When the opening of Legacy Village was delayed for one month, I had no idea God was going to use this time to verify that both Linda and I were under his care.

On September 2 around 9:15 am, I developed slurring of speech and unsteadiness on my feet.  After determining that I had no numbness and my face was not distorted, I chose to rest in my recliner and not call an ambulance. Wisely, our wonderful caregiver called my daughter, who arrived in a matter of minutes and took me to the hospital where the surgery had been performed. 

After being admitted, numerous tests and evaluations were performed. Among the specialists, there continued to be a difference of opinion as to what happened: Was it a TIA or the cumulative results of long-term stress, exacerbated by the complications and infection related to my earlier surgery? Either way, two realities became obvious:

• If it had happened earlier that day, Linda would have been alone, unable to open a window or door, not able to call for help. 

• If Legacy Village had opened on time, no caregiver would have been at my home and my daughter would not have been called.

Leading up to the opening day, complications from my surgery worsened after I was prescribed the wrong antibiotic. On October 1, Linda became a resident in her new home and our daughter and I helped her to adjust.  Later in the day, she dropped by to check on me and again took me to the emergency room where a CT scan revealed that the infection had spread to my kidneys. Finally, an efficacious antibiotic was prescribed. Slowly I began my recovery, and three days later was able to visit Linda. When I saw her, she greeted me with a big smile and a hug. Relieved, I was finally able to catch my breath and rejoice that the new chapter had begun: “The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives” (Psalm 37:23 NLT).