King David, contemplating God’s placement of human beings in the order of His creation, lifted up one of the most probing questions found in the Bible:
When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,
what is mankind that you are mindful of them,
human beings that you care for them (Psalm 8:3-4 NIV)?
When studying related truth found in other passages, Linda and I were always moved to praise and worship. Even though Alzheimer’s has now rendered her incapable of participating in the theological discussions she once enjoyed, I continue to be amazed at her capacity to never give up, and obvious desire to relate to her Savior. Using excerpts from my journal, I will share highlights of our recent journey:
Linda’s Resilience
She never has two days that are the same. In the past week, I have seen this vividly displayed:
- Very absorbed in coloring, which I have not seen in a long time, she acknowledged I was there and scooted her chair over so I could sit beside her. Following distancing guidelines, I told her I would sit in another location and wait for her to finish. For the next fifteen minutes, I watched with delight as she creatively worked on her masterpiece. When finished, she proudly held it up for all to read, “I love Summer.” The picture accompanying this blog was taken the next day during Pet Therapy.
- Frantically rubbing each side of her head, she was not participating in crafts. When I spoke to her, she stopped, weakly smiled, and agreed to go with me. After walking a couple of laps inside, we went to the courtyard and sat briefly in the rockers, while I tried unsuccessfully to engage her in singing. Signaling she needed to use the bathroom, we quickly went to her room. Committed to her remaining as independent as possible, I assisted as she pulled down her pants; however, she forgot to pull down her panties before sitting on the commode. I was able to get her up before she urinated. After cleaning with a wet wipe, I used a wash cloth to remove food from her clothes, and combed her hair before rejoining the group. Leaving her at the table, with trembling hands and closed eyes, broke my heart!
- Having just completed an evacuation drill, she was preoccupied; however, we were soon singing the old songs she loves. Several times she tried to tell me something, but nothing came out coherently. Suddenly, with great seriousness and complete clarity, she looked at me and said, “We have been together a long time and I want you to know I really do love you!” Greatly surprised, I said, “That means so much to me and I really do love you!” Moments later, while checking her foot, I heard her telling the Lord how much she appreciated all I had done for her. When I started to leave, she said, “You are not going to leave me alone are you?” The hubbub of the evacuation seems to have stirred up fears of being alone, memories of our life together, and an awareness that everything is changing.
Ron’s Encounter
Walking with Linda through the ups and downs of Alzheimer’s, coupled with the unrelenting pressures of daily living, caused me to become uncertain as to how I should pray. Paul’s admonition, as it has so many times in the past, became very real: And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words (Romans 8:26 NLT). After a significant period of time, in a moment, my uncertainty was replaced with a wonderful awareness that He is in control and my future is secure.
A few days later, as I listened to a simple hymn, “The Wonder of it All,” I felt surrounded by His love:
There’s the wonder of sunset at evening,
The wonder as sunrise I see;
But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul
Is the wonder that God loves me.
O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all!
Just to think that God loves me.
O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all!
Just to think that God loves me.
There’s the wonder of springtime and harvest,
The sky, the stars, the sun;
But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul
Is a wonder that’s only begun.
O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all!
Just to think that God loves me.
O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all!
Just to think that God loves me.
Ron Harvard Ministries 