Dwelling on the Good News

The picture accompanying today’s blog fails to reveal the details behind the story. Taken Friday night, as Linda sat with her baby doll waiting for bedtime, the obvious joy on her face depicts tranquility, which was very real at that moment! However, it doesn’t give a hint as to what transpired in the previous days; neither does it account for the numbers of wonderful people who collectively work to provide her a purposeful day. As her primary caregiver, years ago I adopted Solomon’s wisdom as a model for walking with her through the joys and perils of Alzheimer’s: Never brag about the plans you have for tomorrow, for you don’t have a clue what tomorrow may bring to you (Proverbs 27:1 TPT).

That Was the Week That Was

When Linda and I married in 1963, a television show, “That Was the Week That Was,” through satire provided a humorous summary of what had happened in the previous week. Conversely, my thoughts from four days of last week are factual and serious:

• Linda was sitting near the television, oblivious to everyone around her, frantically scratching her head. After gently getting her attention, she smiled and accepted my invitation to visit in her room. We had a wonderful time singing and laughing. The sweetness of her expressions warmed my heart! After a while, she said, “It is time to go.” When I escorted her to the activities table, a caregiver quickly prepared a coloring page and gave her a pink crayon, her favorite color. By the time I reached the door, she was immersed in coloring.

• When I arrived the next day, Linda was asleep in a chair. Going to her room, she first tried to stay awake and communicate, but then slept the remaining time I was there. Taking advantage of the situation, I quietly prayed and sang to her. Occasionally, she would indicate she was listening. Before leaving, I asked if she needed to go to the bathroom. Even though she said, “Yes,” she was unable to do so; I noticed a vaginal discharge and called the nurse on duty. A urinary analysis was ordered, but a sample could not be taken until the following day.

• Returning the “Jelly Pop” shoes and knit pants I had washed, I did not immediately see Linda. So, I went directly to her room. Soon, coming down the hall, she spotted me through the door and exuberantly said, “I love you!” It is difficult to describe how sweet those words were to me, especially considering this is not typical behavior for an Alzheimer’s patient. After about fifteen minutes, she wanted to return to her group. This was a blessing because I was still in pain from the toe surgery which had been done last week. 

• Linda had a rough morning: She cried inconsolably when a caregiver tried to get her ready for the day. Furthermore, she did not respond to the nurse’s efforts to comfort her. Later, the lab results came back, confirming she had a UTI. When I came, she told me she was so tired, but I could not get her to rest. Instead, she preferred to walk. Thankfully, my toes had healed enough for me to wear sandals! As I was attempting to leave, she started scratching her head. Then she opened her eyes, flashed her beautiful smile and came to me, as if I had just arrived. We again went back to her room. When I prepared to leave the second time, she was calm and accepted it.

This Is the Truth That Endures

In the life of an Alzheimer’s patient, no two days are the same. This unpredictability exacerbates the already stressful task of being a primary caregiver. During the early years, I searched for useful materials to help me develop a plan of action and measure my progress. Even though I found some helpful sources, most were, as would be expected, painted with large strokes to cover the diversities of this horrible disease. At the end of the day, nothing has helped me as much as “Dwelling on the Good News,” as it is presented in the form of timeless Truth:

Keep your thoughts continually fixed on all that is authentic and real, honorable and admirable, beautiful and respectful, pure and holy, merciful and kind. And fasten your thoughts on every glorious work of God, praising him always.  Put into practice the example of all that you have heard from me or seen in my life and the God of peace will be with you in all things (Philippians 4:8-9 TPT).

The promise, “and the God of peace will be with you in all things,” covers the four days described above, as well as all the unknown twists and turns yet to come.