Even though I am accustomed to seeing daily changes in Linda’s condition, this week I was caught off guard by the range of her symptoms and behaviors:
- During last Sunday’s visit, we spent most of our time walking, frequently stopping for her to clean tables or rearrange pillows. She was very agitated on Monday, hurriedly walking and seldom stopping. When I finally got her to sit down, while rhythmically rubbing her arms and legs, and vigorously patting the chair and pillow behind her head, she experienced auditory hallucinations. With very slight improvement, Tuesday was basically a repeat of the previous day. On Wednesday, deciding to visit earlier in the day, I found her unsteady on her feet and walking in a slow shuffle. Sitting in her chair, she slept most of the time I was there.
- Inexplicably, Thursday was enormously different. I found it hard to believe I was seeing the same person. We had a wonderful time singing, joking, and walking. On numerous occasions, holding my hand and patting my arm, she said, “l love you!” An entry in my journal succinctly sums up the emotional impact all of this had on me: “Obvious changes are taking place, and I am aware they are not temporary. Asking for blessings upon her and strength for me, I told the Lord that only He knows how badly I hurt and need Him!”
When traveling from my present home to the west side of town, I often go through the neighborhood where we lived when Jefferey was killed. Now in a total state of disrepair, for many months, our old home has been vacant. One day this week, after visiting Linda, deeply troubled by the present storm I am facing, I impulsively returned to the scene of the storm which brought great pain into my life forty-three years ago. Even though I was not able to go inside, just walking around the outside and surveying the extent of the deterioration was shocking: overgrown shrubbery, rotting wood, missing shingles, filthy furniture still in place, and a sign in the window, “No Trespassing.” I am not certain why I wanted to see it, but I am glad I did. Reflecting upon the experience has prompted me to identify two essential components for surviving life’s storms:
Search for Treasures After the Storm
Even though I was saddened by what I saw at our old home, in the final analysis, the physical damage does not obliterate the lasting memories that cannot be erased. After all these years, the interior window shutters in the family room are still in place. My father built them on site and the hinges which he installed still have the original screws in place. The sliding glass door, which Uncle Floyd helped me install, appears to be workable. As I looked at the back steps leading to the kitchen upstairs, I could almost taste the endless stream of chocolate chip cookies which Linda had ready for the children when they came home from school. Standing at the front door, I laughed when I remembered Stephanie jumping out of the bushes and surprising Melinda as she kissed her boyfriend goodnight. The sound of Michael dribbling his basketball and honing his skills on the old hoop echoed in my mind. Of greatest importance, I remembered that Jefferey, in an instant, met Jesus by the edge of the road; in the next four years, while continuing to live in the same house, as a family, we confronted our hurts and fears, and planned for the future.
Rebuild Upon an Immovable Foundation
Ira Sankey, an associate of D.L. Moody, composed the music for “A Shelter in the Time of Storm.” Concerning its origin, he noted: “I found this hymn in a small paper, ‘The Postman.’ It was said to be a favorite song of the fisherman on the north coast of England, and they were often heard singing it, as they approached their harbors in the time of storm. As the hymn was set to a weird minor tune, I decided to compose one that could more easily be sung by the people.”
The Lord’s our Rock, in Him we hide, A Shelter in the time of storm;
Secure whatever ill betide, A Shelter in the time of storm.
A shade by day, defense by night, A Shelter in the time of storm;
No fears alarm, no foes affright, A Shelter in the time of storm.
The raging storms may round us beat, A Shelter in the time of storm;
We’ll never leave our safe Retreat, A Shelter in the time of storm.
O Rock divine, O Refuge dear, A Shelter in the time of storm;
Be Thou our Helper ever near, A Shelter in the time of storm.
Ron Harvard Ministries 