The view from atop Lookout Mountain is breathtaking; however, the picture accompanying today’s blog has even greater significance. It was taken in October 2015 and in many ways serves as a timeline for measuring the increasing severity of Linda’s struggle with Alzheimer’s. In previous weeks, I have covered these events in detail. Therefore, in keeping with the tenor of the picture, I shall provide a broad view and end with my thoughts on endurance.
Minor Inconvenience
After moving into our new home two years earlier, Linda and I enjoyed a mostly normal life. We traveled some and just enjoyed being together. Free from the rigors of full-time ministry, we had ample time to pursue a more intimate relationship with Christ and prayerfully intercede for our family. However, that day on the mountain, the smile on my face concealed the pain in my heart as I considered what lay ahead. Subtle warnings were letting me know that the hidden menace was about to become very visible. In February 2014, Linda had finally agreed to seek medical help for her increasing difficulties with memory. Two things quickly became apparent: First, a certain diagnosis was not forthcoming; instead, it proved to be an elusive target. Secondly, the enormity of the cost of all the lab work, tests, and imaging was a harbinger of things to come.
Major Disruption
In October 2016, Linda and I went to lunch at one of our favorite restaurants. After placing our order, she selected a seat and I went to get the condiments. When I returned, she reached out her hand and said, “Hello, I am Michael’s mother. It’s nice to meet you.” Quickly realizing that she was experiencing a break with reality, I silently cried out to God for wisdom. While she talked about meeting her friends from Lee, indicating that she was revisiting her college years, I was trying to devise a plan to get her out of the restaurant without creating a disturbance. After finishing our meal, I said, “It doesn’t look like your friends are coming, why don’t we go ahead and leave?” To my relief, she agreed. Two blocks from the restaurant, she snapped out of it with no memory of what had happened.
For the next two years, our story can best be understood in terms of three simultaneously unfolding realities:
- Medical Intervention: Two days after Linda’s break with reality, her neurologist declared bankruptcy, and it quickly became apparent that getting an appointment with a competent replacement was months away. However, God intervened, and we were able to quickly secure an appointment at a very reputable clinic. Unfortunately, the lack of available medical records necessitated another series of lab work, tests, and imaging. A certain diagnosis became even more difficult because her care now involved a medical team with differing specialties.
- Symptoms and Behaviors: Linda developed excruciating pain in her hip which did not respond to any normal treatment. The debilitating physical symptoms were accompanied by more breaks with reality and encroaching darkness. During these times, she was fearful that I would hurt her; and her actions, language, and behavior were completely inconsistent with her Christian values and beliefs. She alternated between doubting that we were married and expressing a belief that we had been apart for years and only recently gotten back together.
- Spiritual Warfare: Linda’s suffering had acquainted me with the vagaries of Alzheimer’s. In the same way, during nearly forty years of pastoring, I had witnessed the reality of Satan’s desire to destroy the people of God. When first confronted by symptoms that were consistent with advancing Alzheimer’s, nothing seemed to be out of place. However, prompted by the Holy Spirit, I realized that Satan was attacking Linda in her weakened condition, and she was not able to defend herself. Therefore, I put into place a plan of action outlined by Jesus in Matthew 18:18,19. Standing on this truth, our entire family agreed together, cried out unto God, and asked that Linda might be delivered from any attempts by Satan’s to degrade and humiliate her. Not overnight, but wonderfully and steadily, God has answered our prayers.
Final Leg of Our Journey
Since becoming a resident of Legacy Village in October 2018, Linda’s adjustment has exceeded all expectations; however, my adjustment has required rigorous intentionality. I have taken my cue from Job. When facing circumstances over which he had no control and suffering that he could not explain, he declared: Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him… (Job 13:15a NIV. Against this backdrop, Richard Fuller, using maritime terminology, developed an action plan which I am faithfully following:
Anchor yourself steadfastly upon the Lord. Lash yourself to the helm, firmly holding your confidence in God’s faithfulness, His covenant promises, and His everlasting love in Christ Jesus.
Ron Harvard Ministries 